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Unfortunately, it’s a false sense of well-being and is entirely dependent on the actions of others (thus the inevitable crippling neediness).
I’ve heard things like: “When a guy’s relationship ends, he replaces her.
When a woman’s relationship ends, she mourns,” or, “He’s just hooking up with such-and-such to spite the ex-girlfriend,” or “Guys just don’t care” and other nonsense.
Personally, I have had breakups where I pretty much went cold. I wanted her to be OK, I wanted good things for her in life, but I knew that nothing was going to make the situation better.
No discussion was going to fix things, no clarity was to be had – it would have just been an emotional toilet for both of us.
In the case where you dumped the guy, one common reason is that the guy doesn’t want to be alone, he doesn’t want to deal with his grief over the breakup, and he doesn’t want to “deal with himself.” When he jumps into another relationship, he can get a dose of external female validation and derive a feeling of false sense of self-esteem and self-worth from her positive attention.
It has its cost though and eventually devolves into a crippling neediness.
I realize it probably came off jerky, but when I cut off communication, my heart is in the right place.
(Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a monster, I won’t completely cut a girl off, but I definitely won’t discuss anything along a relationship conversational thread.) MORE: 9 Undeniable Signs Your Ex Has Moved on and It’s Really Over This could be for a few reasons.
That is to say, he seeks his feeling of validation and worth from how a woman treats him.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating